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American Idol Top 3 Episode Recap: LIVE BLOG (5/12/09)
Published on: May 12, 2009 – 6:31 pm by Jillian Madison 
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Another week, another episode of American Idol! I’m Jillian Madison. Tonight, the final 3 will sing two songs each (one that the judges chose for them, and one they picked themselves).
Tonight, we’re officially throwing our support behind KRIS ALLEN. Why? Because Adam Lambert is an untalented, eyeliner abusing, drama queen douchebag who makes me throw up in me mouth. Danny Gokey is a lame, dead-wife pimpin’, glasses-wearin’, closeted Taylor Hicks wannabe. And Kris is the least obnoxious of the three. So there you have it. Uh, go Kris.
Danny is starting the show with Paula’s pick, “Dance Little Sister” by Terrence Trent D’Arby. And of course, it’s the same performance we’ve been seeing for the last 3 months – Danny jumping around on stage doing the white man’s overbite for 3 minutes. Hey Danny – why are your pants tucked into your unlaced boots, you HUGE TOOL? And what is that cheap-ass, busted medallion around your neck!? Yawn. GO HOME, GOKEY. GO HOME. Maybe Wisconsin still loves you, because no one else does. Rating: 3/10.
Kara and Randy chose “Apologize” by One Republic for Kris Allen, who for some reason, has blue nail polish on his right thumb. Sorry, but he just lost major points. He’s on the piano. Rough start, rough middle, rough end. He can not hit those high notes on the “too late” parts to save his life. It sounded like a cloned version of the song; he didn’t own it at all. Sorry, Kris, no good. Rating: 4/10.
Simon chose “One” by U2 for Adam Glambert. It’s already slow, boring, and self-indulgent in the first 5 seconds. Did Adam get a haircut? Because he’s looking like an out of touch lesbian hipster that just got attacked by a pair of rusty gardening shears. This is undoubtedly the WORST rendition of “One” that I’ve ever heard in my life. I can’t believe U2 approved this shit. Another 3 minutes of out of tune shrieking from Adam Lambert, and of course, the judges licked his ass afterwords. Sickening. You know what? His glam-rock, campy, theater boy schtick has been done many times before, by people far more talented. He needs to get over himself, and the judges need a reality check. Far more people hate Lambert than like Lambert. Rating: 1/10.
BREAKING NEWS: We were able to reach Bono of U2 for comment:
Danny Gokey chose “You Are So Beautiful” by Joe Cocker. God. My eyes could not have rolled any further in the back of my head. THIS IS SO BORING TO ME, CAN’T YOU SEE-EEEEE? Danny is supposed to be making an impression – but with this awful CHURCH RENDITION of an already tacky song, the only people he’s impressing are deaf women over the age of 82. Wrong song, buddy, wrong song. Painful on so many levels. Rating: 1/10.
Kris Allen is up next, singing “Heartless” by Kanye West. And you know what? IT’S AMAZING. 100x better than the original. It’s an unplugged version, just Kris and his guitar. And I’m loving it. Best performance by any performer, of the entire season. By far. Kris Allen just made Lambert and Danny Gokey look even more pathetic. Rating: 10/10.
AND OF COURSE, Adam Lambert is performing last. Again. Because they know whoever performs last, will be freshest in the television viewer’s minds, and will be more likely to get votes when the phone lines open. It’s just another pathetic, strategic move by the Idol producers, to throw even more support behind this untalented Broadway reject. And it’s just another reason WE HATE IDOL.
(And while we’re talking about Lambert… you know the only thing worse than Adam Lambert? ADAM LAMBERT FANS. They are some of the most obnoxious people I’ve ever encountered. They’re rude, they’re immature, and not surprisingly, have a combined IQ of 27. These are the morons who order sausage on their pizza, despite hating sausage, because THAT’S WHAT ADAM ORDERS! They are the pathetic souls who pay $70 on eBay for an Adam Lambert shower curtain. Give me a break. Do the world a favor: get a life, and throw your support behind someone who actually has an ounce of talent.)
Lambert is singing “Cryin” by Aerosmith. And somewhere in America, Steven Tyler is “crying” over his song being bastardized by such a poser. Guys, I’m not just saying this because I hate Adam, but this performance is AWFUL. So much worse than Kris Allen. Honestly, I’m so sick of seeing this TOOL sticking his tongue out. I don’t need to constantly think about where that tongue has been; I feel like he’s gonna give me an STD through my television screen. Horrible. And after one final plea by Simon to get voters to call in for this assface, we’re finally through with tonight’s painful episode. Rating: 1/10.
We’ll bring you the results as soon as they go down tomorrow night. Until then…
ugliest top 3 too.. don’t forget that part.
I THINK VOMIT IS THE BIGGEST JERK GOING. IF SHE OR HE OR BOTH HATES THE SHOW SO MUCH STOP WATCHING. DO NOT, HOWEVER, SAY ALL THE TERRIBLE THINGS ABOUT THE THREE LEFT. ESPECIALLY, ADAM LAMBERT WHO IS THE BEST THE SHOW HAS EVER HAD. HE WILL GO FAR IN HIS CAREER. SO, GO THROUGH UP IN YOUR MOUTH ALL YOU WANT JERK.
WTF is that on adam’s neck??!?!?!
haaa, umm, what is that? oh i love this site.
Gokey was DISGUSTING. i mean he is so boring, how did he get this far, his lame laugh and vampire teeth –
ok, this is real hell…2 songs each?
LMAO at that picture. Adam’s face is ALL FOUNDATION! blech.
These whores don’t watch enough antm because these angles are doing nothing for their double chins.
Jillian Madison … you make me laugh. I could not care less who wins the show at this point. I can’t stand any of them. Kris is the lesser of the 3 evils. Lambert is just absolutely disgusting to watch and listen to.
apologize is one of my MOST HATED SONGSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Nice nail polish Kris
And, once again, little bits of me are dying inside, one crappy song at a time. What the HELL is THAT THING on Adam’s neck? This really is the WORST season of AI, even the one with that dumpy Taylor Hicks was better than this.
id laugh if Kris took the whole thing. and screwed over ADAM LAMBUSH and GO-GOKEY
who’s actually playing the piano in this song? it ain’t kris!
ok. i think its a BOIL. im not kidding IM a P.A. –its is a boil. Ive seen it before while he was singing. he needs to get this checked out.
My dog and cat are going apeshit over this nonsense. Now I’m convinced this show makes animals try to kill each other.
God Openlove.. couldn’t they have photoshopped that shit out!??!
This is so sad. I cant even tolerate what the judges say each week, so bogus, lame, all I hear is BLA BLA BLA
My grandfather had a boil. it got worse over old age –i was scared.
I will keep an eye on Adam’s boil tonight. I hope it explodes during one of his balls-in-a-vice notes.
Whatever that is on Adam’s neck is DISGUSTING. It’s probably a STD.
Guys, really!? This season is so bad.
I may have to leave the room before Lambert performs. He is my most hated Idol contestant of all time.
Um, –where’s lambutt?
oh yeah, last again, rating whores!
oh here we go. PRETENTIOUSNESS OVERLOAD.
EWWWW ADAMS NAILSSSS
i just threw up a little in my mouth.
What is this… a fucking high school musical?
HAHAHAH that horrible tongue shit. WTF is that!
BWAOOHHOOAHAHGHHH!
SCREETCHING, my dogs are going nuts. Jillian, you were right, he is HEDWIG and the Angry Inch. –go ahead google it. while youre at it wikipedia that shit…ADAM *IS Hedwig. Um…just saying.
Wow, this show is really –or has really gone down the frickin’ tubes. and what i find so lame is that they positioned everything so it “appeared” as tho the finalists just so happen to see the text while infront of audiences? please. they are like…”OK, Adam while talking to the mayor grab your phone”…. am i right?
…and the american public says: oh how cool! look at that timing.
it’s awful. they so clearly pimp adam with the lighting, their retarded non critiques, etc every time just nasty.
Can we Kara/Cara/whatever be voted off? Her comments are stupid, her voice is annoying, and I’m tired of seeing her kiss Glambert’s ass.
Why are they even continuing with this sham of a show? They’ve already decided the winner.
Nonetheless, I’m voting for Kris tonight and hoping Adam gets “the biggest upset in Idol history.”
im sorry to say this but the lame demographic that watches American Idol could give a SHIT LESS about African Malaria Awareness. OK????
Add me to the many who can not stand Lambert. So glad I stumbled on this site. He has one of the most obnoxious voices I have ever heard.
i’m thinking a Jobless Americans Awareness would be more appropriate….gee it’s nice to see American dollars go overseas to buy bed nets when our economy is in the toilet. Thanks AI & Carrie Underwood.
Hahhah Jillian you pick the best screencaps for adam.
this is so boring to me
am in a church?
I have to get so drunk for this it’s not even funny.
God that was painful
he just said: Gokey:
i cant listen to all the “Oh-pinions”.
ummmm
I love this site but I have to tell you I will chew that things off Adams neck mmmm
I really can not believe how awful Danny Gokey’s version of “You Are So Beautiful” was. SO PAINFUL!!!
the lady watches this show…shit, im missing biggest loser. ha!
Hokey Gokey
Wait whats’ going on? is anyone singing Hall & Oates yet?
Kris might make it… this is better than Kanye’s but a big risk, because this song is horrible AS IS.
Wait, i can finally understand all the words with Kris singing it! LOL
Kris had me to about half way the song
I think LAMBURP will be singing: IF YOU SEEK AMY: Britney Spears
I liked it better than the original version too! I agree with you 100% Jillian!
I don’t give out compliments very easily. But Kris Allen’s version of Heartless was friggin phenomenal.
good lord, another LAMB song. nooo.
I think thats the first time you’ve given somebody a 10/10!!!!!!
Lame-bert will be singing “Cryin’” by Aerosmith, which describes just how sad his butchering of “One” made me.
I might actually down load that from iTunes SO much better than original
This is just the kind of “EARLY” aerosmith kara was looking for right?
this song is predictable –and again so lame for him. god i hate this POS.
f@** you! he is wicked hot. i think your just jelouse!
this show blows.
I bet Crying is what Steven Tyler is doing after hearing what Glambert’s done to his song. OMG – horrible!
Has Simon ever said people should vote for someone before?????
i hope steve tyler is too wasted AND riding rock-n-roller coaster to care
Well, I did my bit, I voted for Kris, I got through like 6 times. I honestly think he might have a chance at it, we’ll see. I’ve never heard the song that he sang second, and I thought he did pretty damned good, but I never heard the original. GOD, that’s an awful pic of Adam up there, it makes me want to, and I mean no offense to you, Vomit, but it makes me want to VOMIT. Uggggg, Mommy, make the ugly scary man go away. Oh, honey, Mommy is trying to make the ugly scary man go away, but all these little fantards won’t let him.
None taken… because that’s how I feel every week when I watch AI. The name just stuck.
Kris SUCKED. How the HELL do you give him a 10/10? And Adam 1/10? Clearly you love Adam because every week you give him that same low score. You’re disgusting. Get a freaking life Jillian.
LOL…go KRIS! you sexy little ass yummy piece of sexyness.
Danny, i could put up with you for the final
Adam….BARF
yall hate idol, yet..:
1) dedicate a website to hating something you hate to begin with (instead of spending money on a website dedicated to something you love or like to do
2) apparently watch the episodes thoroughly so that you can comment and nit-pick on the episodes ultimately wasting your time to do both
3) argue over all the fine details of each contestant yet i’d bet most if not all of you have no expertise on actually judging singing and base this forum on your own opinions… some might even call you no-talent ass clowns.
4) Any of you know the contestants personally? I see you all make assumptions/judgements yet you have nothing to base it your judgements on other than pure visual. I’m not saying that the contestants aren’t somewhat enhanced through the show, but obviously not so much that they made it to the top 3. Many asshat contestants that sounded somewhat good got to the top 12 but aren’t there now. You have to make a show but out of all tryouts for america you’re telling me the top 3 are crap?
I have to say, I can read this website an think it’s amusing, I just take it with a grain of salt. But when you crack down on the Adam fans, that makes me SO mad. ERG.
LOL@U, you are a NO Talent Ass Clown.
lol@u
1) Dedicating a website to something you love never gets media attention.
2) It’s all american rights to nit-pick and judge people. Plus, freedom of speech is wonderful.
3) I think many of us have ears to hear and listen and know good music. We are the people who make or break a recording artist by purchasing their album. Not many of us can sing, and like myself have no musical talent, but i can tell a good singer from a no talent screamer.
4) I know none of the contestants, only by what i see on TV. Again, they willingly put themselves out there for judgement, so we will judge. We don’t really HATE these people, we are simply trying to stop bad talent form making it big. ALSO, it’s just fun to talk crap.
Idol has become a popularity contest, and not a singing contest! It’s up to us to just point this out : )
Danny looks like a fat, dorky Robert Downy Jr. Why hasn’t anyone else noticed?
lol, Lindsay, I noticed that a long time ago. But, you forgot to say a fat, dorky, DUMPY Robert Downy Jr.
Let me add: Fat, dorky, dumpy, bloated, sausagey, pube-faced RDJ.
Yeah, Lindsay, yeah. He looks like a bloated Robert Downey Jnr before he got his teeth fixed and sounds like Michael Bolton on acid. It’s a winning combination. He wears the glasses so no one will beat the shit out of him and God knows, they want to. People say he’s got the Christian vote. What they mean is that Jim and Tammy Faye Bakker would have voted for him.
Jillian, I love your stuff. It brings on the incontinance thing something chronic (which is to say, it makes me pee in my pants, it’s so funny) but I think you do protesteth too much when it comes to Adam Lambert. Your scores of 0, 1, and negative 5 outta ten and your scathing remarks about his vocals and appearance can have only one effect, and that is to get people out there voting for the guy. Hell even Carrie Prejean voted her tits off for Adam last night and you know how she feels about people who wear too much foundation and eyeliner pretending that they have too much talent!
And Kris, well you gotta want Kris to win. If nothing else, it would really piss off his wife who looks like she’s just swallowed a case of razor blades everytime the camera shows the tweens saying they want her husband. I just love the drama of this show so much. It’s like a cult without the death benefit plan!
Watching Adam is like watching a two hour car chase. It’s boring. And just like Adam, in the end they will crash/fall/burn.
I’m convinced that the majority of America are sheep that will believe any rhetoric you spew at them. I mean hell, ya’ll elected obama ffs.
I skipped AI to watch Biggest Loser last night. At least BL had some females on it. I mean genetic females. Not future females.
Hmm that reminds me, AI should be renamed “Just Plain Old Losers.”
JUST BE GLAD IT’S ALMOST OVVVVEEERRRRRRRRRRR! If whoever wins becomes as popular as Kelly Clarkson I’m never listening to the radio again. I can’t imagine I’d like any of these guys’ cds, and you KNOW I fucking hate all of Kelly’s songs with a passion.
Fuck the radio & mainstream music! Which includes the lovely Katy Perry who will perform tonight and surly sound like shit.
Folks, Adam sticks his tongue out because that is his natural instinct when a shafted object (the microphone… or a penis) gets near his face.
Here’s a video of Adam back when he was *****gasp***** “normal” *****gasp***** I do believe I feel a case of the vapors coming upon me. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wA7bA6rhKvc
LOL he looked like the Craigslist Killer back then.
wick…lol…you nailed it!
is this nightmare over? I ihoping the nightmare called idol vanishes after next year
These homecoming vids are fucked up. Now I really get it. Creepy, screaming children make this awful crap happen.
adam kissed a boy and he likes it! that’s OK
IT’S JUST THAT HE’S A HORRIBLE SINGER ARE YOU LITTLE GIRLS ALL DEAF? DEAF! AND SOOO UNORIGINAL IN HIS STYLE AND LOOK.
hmmmm…wonder if this will get deleted….All the people commenting on this website, you are SICK! I got on here by accident, how the hell did that happen?????? Wow, you are all a bunch of LOSERS and HATERS!!!!!!!!! So unhappy with your lives hugh? Have to put others down. Real amazing how you HATE IDOL SO MUCH yet watch it and wast your time commenting on it…oh forgot time is all you have because you don’t have a LIFE! It’s true what they say when others are unhappy with themselves and their lives they look for fault in others to makes themselves feel better. AWwww poor pathetic people, get therapy or something. Just some advice…CHANGE THE CHANNEL IDIOTS…go play the Wii or with your wee wee…just go do something else. Oh, by the way I won’t be back to read comments. I HAVE A LIFE!!
Try to have yourselves a reality check!! Gosh you’re all a bunch of LOSERS, MOTHERFUCKERS, SOB’S that don’t appreciate music. Gokey was awesome, Kris and Adam are awesome. That prejudice of yours against him is untolerant, and it should be punished for sure. You are a bunch of nobodies with nth to do on your fucking boring lives. AND IF YOU HATE AMERICAN IDOL WHY ON THE FUCKING WORLD WRITE ABOUT IT AND LOVING ONE OF THE PERFORMERS?????? Go to a hearing appointment… better a psycologist because that’s a disease you know…. If it was on my hands, this site would be banned from the internet. Close this fucking site please.
If it were, how did you say it, “on my hands”, idiots like YOU would be “banned from the internet”, it’s called free speech, you freaking moron. Go away, nobody around here cares what you think, honestly. Obviously, you took the time to put in a name and an email address and post that lame ass comment on this site, so what does that make you? That’s just, once again, what word did you use, UNTOLERANT? (and once again, there’s the collective intelligence of your average Adam Fan shows itself) Maybe YOU should go see a “psycologist”, whatever the bloody hell that is. Maybe a “psycologist” is a profession known only to idiots like you and little “get a life” above you. Bunch of freaking idiots, the lot of you. This site is actually extremely mellow in their dislike of certain AI contestants. Go to some of the sites that you actually have to become a member before you can post anything and post your crap. Those “hate” sites would have your above post deleted and you banned quicker than you could take your thumb out of your ass and back in your mouth where you usually have it when it’s not stuck up in your ass. Douchebag.
Hey Dafeedil, don’t you have some dirty dishes to wash? After you’re done searching for more Adam videos why don’t you start on that laundry? Obsessed. Obsessed. Obsessed.
wow ur a bitch. u know wat… wen i date him and make him strait we will b the ones to share eyeliner. so wat now u mother fucker ass suckin bitch
Oh, I love Adam Lambert, as much as I too love adam lambert. I find your post idiotic and thoughtless as much as the next adam hater. you’re the main reason people hate adam/his fans. also, did you ever take 1st grade english? your grammar and spelling is painful to read.
Oh btw, any adam-haters wondering how people can come across this site accidently, which i did, while i was googling pictures of adam lambert (i know i know…don’t bother commenting on that) there was the photo of him with the word ‘GROSS’ on it, so i went to the site, and i discovered THIS. So, yeah they’re not lying about stubling across this site though.
Any image search would still havethe “wehateidol.com” url listed underneath the image. So out of ALL the pics that come up in a search, you still purposely clicked on one labeled GROSS with wehateidol under it. I don’t consider that stumbling or accidental. So why the Adamtards would still click on that and come here is beyond me.
I clicked on it to see what retarded site I would find. Oh, and look what I found!
How ironic is it that a “genius” such as yourself spends so much time on a site that’s just so “retarded.” So you lied about ending up here by accident. You’re spinning like a top. Nikki is your last name Pelosi by chance?
It’s not like I intentionally typed WEHATEIDOL into my computer. but whatever, you’re the main reason i dilike this site, the reason i come back is because it’s funny.
Now, now kids. Play nice. I was just reading some comments on an Idol tard site, and this girl who calls herself “adamsangel” or something stupid like that said that Adam Lambert has changed her life, everything she now does is because of Adam, she could never imagine loving another guy as much as she loves Glambert, and she’ll be old enough to date, soon. Somebody please, put the bullet in the gun now and put the gun in my hand, ok? Seriously, in the beginning I wouldn’t have cared if Glam won AI, but it’s these freaks that have made me hate him with a passion, and it grows with each passing day.
oh i almost forgot, I LOVE Adam Lambert!
Hahaha damn I’m good.
And, besides LOVING Adam Lambert, it looks like I also have a split personality!!! It just drives these Adam fans INSANE that there are people out there that can’t stand him. Wow.
the fricken thing on adams neck is sooooo photo shoped in there he dosent have shit like that on him beceuse if you scroll down to the other picks its not there!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
-Taylor
Ladies and gentlemen, lets give our one and only Taylor a rousing round of applause for her very astute observation of Adam’s perhaps existent, perhaps nonexistent neck anomaly. Is it real or is it photoshopped?
this is what happened, he was practicing his vocals in his room and a really big bug bit him in the neck for wailing too much. LOL
I had no problem with you making fun of Adam because everyone has different opinions. I don’t care if you don’t like him. But what you said about Adam fans is really insulting. I’m an Adam fan, and I’m sure you’re not trying to offend anybody, if you are, well that’s really messed up, but saying what you wrote is like saying everybody who likes My Chemical Romance cuts themselves because the band is in the “emo” genre. First, “rude and immature”? I’m probably proving that by writing this comment (lol) but I don’t actually know any Adam fans that are “rude and immature”. And “combined IQ of 27″, I’m not even going to comment about that. And no one would order sausage on their pizza if they don’t like it. Maybe if they never tried sausage, they would order it because it would be cool to like what Adam likes and they want to see if they do, but if someone (even a mentally retarded Adam fan, as you pointed out) doesn’t like sausage, they don’t order sausage. And if someone pays $70 on Ebay for an Adam shower curtain, what does that have to do with anything? ONE person buys an Adam shower curtain for $70, and suddenly all Adam fans are pathetic losers who need to get a life. Ah, I get it. So everybody who thinks Adam Lambert has talent is RUDE AND IMMATURE. Adam fans all need to get a life. JUST BECAUSE WE LIKE A PARTICULAR SINGER. I’ll admit, I’m taking this too far, but this just made me really pissed off.
I really don’t care if people post comments intended to make fun of adam, danny, or kris, because everyone is entitled to their own opinion. But, this site is called wehateidol, isn’t it? So, when you post a comment on this page, it is either supposed about adam, danny, or kris, (or any of the other idols) NOT their fans. All 3 of them have been given an amazing ability to sing.
(Oh, BTW, the show isn’t called “Who’s the Straightest” it is called “American Idol” and is about vocal talent, which Adam has alot of. Adam’s sexuality is none of our business. It’s his life, let him live the way he wants to.)
You guys can talk trash about idol all you want but the only reason your doing it is because you have no life and you have no friends so you decide to talk shit about people. Go do something useful ass holes
I Had no problem with you making fun about american idol and Adam And Kris,Danny.Because everybody has his own mind and opinion
And they have really good abillity to sing ,dance and performe..
I really wanna See one of you just trying to performe as they do you idiots..
But as u said Anonymous You have no life,No friends, That’s why You are doing that..
So I won’t Annoy myself because of some lifeless,dombs
U R RELLY HOPELESS
U PPL R SOOOO RUDE!!!!!!
GOD ADAM IS THE BOMB!!!!!
OK HE WILL HAVE MORE TALENT THAN U WOULD EVER HAVE!!!!
=P
SO STICK THT IN UR JUICEBOX AND SUCK IT!!!!!!
That whole sausage pizza thing? Freakin pathetic, guys! Seriously, have you looked at yourself lately? You watch American Idol despite hating Adam Lambert SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO much.
And you like Kris Allen so much, right? I thought you guys HATED American Idol. So why do you even take sides? Has Kris Allen ever been on Broadway? Didn’t think so! So before juding all us Adam fans out there, why don’t you think about yourselves, you hypocrites! Seriously!
And Adam is NOT eyeliner abusing. Real men wear eyeliner, so I suggest that half of you try it out and do something with your life, you freakin retards.
And by the way, you claim at the very top of this article, that Kris Allen is too boring to even care about. So what the hell? You take his side anyway?