American Idol Season 8 Episode Recap – San Francisco Auditions

Another week, another episode of American Idol. This was another BORING, BORING EPISODE. So without further adieu, let’s meet…

THE 5 BIGGEST REJECTS AT THE SAN FRANCISCO AUDITIONS (1/20/09)

	1. Meet Tatiana from Puerto Rico. She showed up wearing a hoochie leopard print dress with some wedding veils sewn to the hem. She had a God-awful hyena laugh that made me want to kill myself. That shit may fly in Puerto Rico, but here, she just came across like a crazy person.. ENJOY YOUR 5 MINUTES, YOU HAVE NO REAL SHOT, GO BACK TO PUERTO RICO AND BRUSH YOUR YELLOW TEETH.
	2. Dean Anthony Bradford showed up in a heavy plaid coat that looked like it was once a tapestry in King Arthur’s castle. It complimented his Madonna gloves with the fingers cut out quite nicely. Simon made fun of his hair color, and he told us “the carpet matches the drapes.” Gross. Save the decor talk for Vern Yip. HEY DEAN, LEARN HOW TO DRESS YOURSELF. AND TRIM YOUR SIDEBURNS. YOU’RE NOT LUKE PERRY.
	3. Dalton Powell solved a Rubick’s Cube fror Ryan Seacrest. But I don’t think he has testicles, because his singing voice was higher pitched than Aaron Neville’s after inhaling helium. . BRACES? REALLY? DUDE, YOU’RE LIKE 30. GOOD LUCK WITH THAT SHIT. GO HOME AND SAY HI TO YOUR ORTHADONTIST FOR ME.
	4. It’s Akilah, the bee moron with the 3rd grade education who thinks she’s pre-med. She brought a huge folder of medical diagrams and claimed to be a self taught vocalist. She pointed out her TRA-SHEE-UH (trachea) to Ryan Seacrest, and told the judges she “sang from her rectum.” Yeah honey, that’s about right. . JASON CASTRO CALLED, HE WANTS HIS NASTY HAIR BACK. GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR RECTUM. BYE BYEEEE.
	5. Annie Murdoch had to be totally drunk. If she wasn’t drunnk, she was totally high. I’m not exactly sure, but I think that choker was holding her neck up. She sounded like ass and they threw her out faster than Michelle Obama to a hideous dress. . CHERYL TIEGS? IS THAT YOU? SEE YOU ON INTERVENTION, LUSH.

There’s our take… what did you guys think? Let us know your thoughts in the comments. We’ll see you tomorrow night for another episode of Idol.

1. Sara K

   January 20th, 2009

   San Francisco only produced 12 golden tickets… that’s half of what Kansas City and Phoenix provided last weekend. What is going on with this show? It is a pathetic, boring shadow of its former self. It’s almost unwatchable to me.

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2. chase

   January 20th, 2009

   did anybody even show up for these san francisco auditions? they only showed like 10 people during the entire episode

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3. Mel

   January 20th, 2009

   I did laugh when Akila The Bee said, “Paula had a very hit in the ‘80s when I was a child.” Only good moment of the night.

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4. alexis

   January 20th, 2009

   What do you expect from the city that brought us William Hung! :) Twelve people made it to Hollywood, and how many did we see? Thank God this show was only an hour. It was awful.

   This recap made me laugh. I’ll be back tomorrow!

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